DEATH BY A THOUSAND CUTS

There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise promotes health. (Proverbs 12: 18)

The worst thing isn't always the big time haters on the sideline who say, “You can’t do it.  It won’t work.  You’ll never make it.”

No. The most painful thing is the small-time doubters on your team who say,

"You should go left," every time you say "Let's go right;"

who says, "The south is much nicer," every time you say, "Steer north;"

who take over when you say, "I'm doing this;"

who replies, "Ah, you can do it," when you scream, "Please help!"

It’s somehow especially sad when the damage comes from someone who actually likes you.

Jesus said, “Where I go you know, and the way you know.”

But Thomas immediately answered, “Lord, we do not know where You are going, and how can we know the way?” (John 14: 4-5)

Thomas believed that Jesus was the Messiah.  He trusted in the Lord’s ultimate plan.  But from day-to-day, he expected Jesus to screw up whatever he was working on at the moment.  

When Jesus said, “Lazarus is dead... Nevertheless let us go to him,”  Thomas was committed to going wherever Jesus went.

But Thomas couldn’t help saying to his fellow disciples, “Let us also go, that we may die with Him.” (John 11: 14-16)

You can be a Thomas and not know it.  You probably don’t realize that you’re killing the one you love.   You certainly don’t mean to do it.  You’re just “joking” or “trying to help.” 

But consider how often your first response to even the little things they say is, “No that’s wrong,” ------ even when you haven’t heard all of what they’re saying.

Think back over the “advice” you’ve offered and how often your counsel was just to do the opposite of whatever they were excited about doing. 

They came to you pumped about going and you said, “Don’t you think you need to stay?” 
They came to you determined to stay and you said, “Maybe it’s time for you to go.”
They prayed and fasted and told you what the Lord had shown them and you said, “Nah.  You’re supposed to do something entirely different.”

Are you a Thomas?

Jesus chose Thomas on purpose.  Thomas’ doubtful nature was important to Jesus’ mission, and  your Thomas-ness is needed as well. 

But you need to be aware of the pain it causes.  You need to know that your doubt adds to wounds that they receive from the rest of the world.

Then He said to Thomas, “Reach your finger here, and look at My hands; and reach your hand here, and put it into My side. Do not be unbelieving, but believing.”

Brother Thomas/ Sister Thomas, we need you to see how things might go wrong so that we can prepare for those contingencies.  But we also need you to trust us not only for the end destination but for the incremental turns along the way. 

We trust you, Brother Thomas/ Sister Thomas.  And because we trust you, your constant doubting makes us constantly doubt ourselves. 

Know your power.  Know the razor sharpness of your idle words.  Don’t silence yourself.  Don’t sheath your blade.

But please, be careful with that thing.

The knife in the back from the hater or the thousand stinging cuts from the doubter on your side: they both bleed by the same amount.

---Anderson T. Graves II   is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry, and rural leadership development.

Rev. Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Hall Memorial CME Church in Montgomery, Alabama, executive director of the Substance Abuse Youth Networking Organization (SAYNO) and director of rural leadership development for the National Institute for Human Development (NIHD).

Email atgravestwo2@aol.com

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To hear sermons, read devotions, and learn more about the ministry at Hall Memorial CME Church, visit www.hallmemorialcme.blogspot.com .

You can read more on Pastor Graves's personal blog at www.andersontgraves.blogspot.com  .

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Hall Memorial CME Church

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