DRAMA ENVY: I WISH I HAD YOUR PROBLEMS

For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life.  (Romans 5: 10)

All across my newsfeeds I see people posting about the haters trying to get at them, the cheating men/ women who don’t appreciate them, the fake friends who gossip behind their backs, and the devil--- the devil attacking them at every turn.

I envy those people.

I envy them because all their problems are external, and external problems are easy to fix. 

Got haters?  Stop listening to them.

Being cheated on?  Leave that fool and don’t take them back.

Fake, gossiping friends?  Stop telling them your business.  And stop calling them “friends.”

Hateful boss?  Transfer.

Dysfunctional, co-dependent family?  Move and stop calling them 20 times a day.

Nosy folks on Facebook?  Get off Facebook.  (If you can’t handle strangers you friended disagreeing with you, just delete your social media profile.)

And the devil?  The devil’s the easiest one.  FORGET THE DEVIL. Focus on God.  Jesus handled satan a long time ago. 

I wish I was one of those people who’s pleased with myself and afflicted only by external enemies and haters.  But sadly that’s not my luck.

My biggest enemy is ME.

Like Paul said, “The good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.”  (Romans 7: 19-23)

I don’t wake worried in the middle of the night, afraid of what my haters are going to try.  I do stress over how prepared I am (or am not) to fulfill my part of all the deals I’ve made with God over the years.

I seldom get into a lot of drama with other people.  My headaches come from pulling logs out of my own eye.  My freshest and deepest scars have come from wrestling with myself.  And I’m a tough dude. 

So, I look with wonder at all these folks who only every have trouble because of what other people do to them.  It’s like the strange gospel narrative I hear in some Christian circles: 

We know that the Lord Jesus interceded in history to save us from sin.  But the way they tell it, the Lord apparently came to save them from EVERYBODY ELSE’S sins.  Must be because they quickly say that they don’t regret their old ways.    So they’re unrepentant ----but saved.  Therefore, they must be saved from what other people did wrong.  In their version of the gospel, every saint is a victim of sin, rescued by the grace of God in Jesus Christ.

But I don’t read it like that. 

The way I see the gospel, Jesus came to save me from MY sins.  Jesus came to save you from YOUR sins.  We aren’t the victims. 

We’re the villains.

For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. (Romans 5: 10)

I have my share of haters, false friends, unreasonable supervisors, crazy family, and spiritual attacks.  I know that you do, too.  But I strongly recommend a fresh assessment of who is the greatest source of trouble in your life.  Is it really ALL men? ALL women?  Is it really only their fault?  Or is it your choices?  Does the problem begin with what they do, or with how you respond to what they do?

But probably, it’s them.  Just them.  Not you, not you at all.

You don’t contribute anything to your own drama.

It’s probably just me.

If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us. (1 John 1: 8-10)

---Anderson T. Graves II   is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry, and rural leadership development.

Rev. Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Miles Chapel CME Church in Fairfield, Alabama;  executive director of the Substance Abuse Youth Networking Organization (SAYNO);  and director of rural leadership development for the National Institute for Human Development (NIHD).

Subscribe to my personal blog  www.andersontgraves.blogspot.com .

Email atgravestwo2@aol.com

Friend me at www.facebook.com/rev.a.t.graves

Follow me on twitter @AndersonTGraves 

#Awordtothewise

You can help support this ministry with a donation to Miles Chapel CME Church.

You can help support Rev. Graves’ work by visiting his personal blog and clicking the DONATE button on the right-hand sidebar.

Support by check or money order may be mailed to 

Miles Chapel CME Church

P O Box 132

Fairfield, Al 35064

REAL OR FAKE?

Then one who was demon-possessed, blind and mute was brought to Jesus; and He healed him, so that the blind and mute man both spoke and saw.  And all the multitudes were amazed and said, “Could this be the Son of David?”

Now when the Pharisees heard it they said, “This fellow does not cast out demons except by Beelzebub, the ruler of the demons.” (Matthew 12: 22-24)

Jesus healed people of incurable illnesses.  He delivered people from spiritual and psychological affliction.  He manifest the pure grace of merciful God.  So naturally they accused him of being a devil-worshipper.

The Pharisees proudly bragged to Jesus that  “We were not born of fornication; we have one Father—God.” (John 8:41)

And Jesus replied, “You are of your father the devil, and the desires of your father you want to do.” (John 8: 44)

The sons of satan accused the Son of God of being an agent of the devil.  It would be funny if it wasn’t so familiar.

Crazy people look at sane people like the sane people are crazy.

Dumb folks ask, “Why you always doin’ stupid stuff like readin’?”

The most gossiping, cheating, fighting, conflict-provoking people on the internet constantly post their complaints about haters startin’ drama.

It’s O.K.  They can’t help it.  They’re so deep in their dysfunction that wrong feels normal to them.  So when you come around living like you’ve got good sense, it makes them un-comfortable.  Your presence and lifestyle makes them feel convicted.  Your existence makes them feel bad, so they call you bad.

They are surprised that you do not join them in their reckless, wild living, and they heap abuse on you. (1 Peter 4:4, NIV)

The next time some fool(s) calls you fake because you don’t engage in regular acts of stupid, don’t get upset with them and certainly don’t feel bad about living your life wisely.  Stop and ask yourself, “What do they think ‘real’ looks like?”

You see, if real to them is sin and foolishness then when they call you fake  they’re calling you righteous and wise.

Acknowledge their position. Offer appreciation for their observation.  And continue with your day. Say, “If what you do is real  then thank you for thinking I’m fake,” and walk away.

Nah.  Don’t do that.  That would be provoking.   You don’t have to say anything because anything you say can and will be used against you.

People in the wrong accused Jesus of being wrong, and Jesus, who had the means and right to perfectly justify His actions, faced their accusations with courageous SILENCE.

And while He was being accused by the chief priests and elders, He answered nothing.  Then Pilate said to Him, “Do You not hear how many things they testify against You?” But He answered him not one word.(Matthew 27: 12-14)

Face your insulters.  Don’t fear them.  But also don't let them provoke you into an emotional or unwise response.  Remember that Jesus understands how you feel.  Take courage and calm in the fact that God is on your side.

Jesus said, “If they have called the master of the house Beelzebub, how much more will they call those of his household! Therefore DO NOT FEAR THEM.” (Matthew 10: 25-26)

Don’t let the fools turn you into one of them.  Don’t get real in their twisted way.  Stay real in Jesus’ real way.

Better to be fake to them and real to God than the other way around.

---Anderson T. Graves II   is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry, and rural leadership development.

Rev. Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Miles Chapel CME Church in Fairfield, Alabama;  executive director of the Substance Abuse Youth Networking Organization (SAYNO);  and director of rural leadership development for the National Institute for Human Development (NIHD).

Subscribe to my personal blog  www.andersontgraves.blogspot.com .

Email atgravestwo2@aol.com

Friend me at www.facebook.com/rev.a.t.graves
Follow me on twitter @AndersonTGraves 

You can help support this ministry with a donation to Miles Chapel CME Church.

You can help support Rev. Graves’ work by visiting his personal blog and clicking the DONATE button on the right-hand sidebar.

Support by check or money order may be mailed to 

Miles Chapel CME Church

P O Box 132

Fairfield, Al 35064

A WORD TO THE WISE. Proverbs 31: 26. "Gracious Lady"

Proverbs 31: 26     She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness.

Proverbs 31: 26.  The ideal woman, the kind who’d make a great queen, knows what to say and exactly how to say it.  She is not the airhead  laughing mindlessly and loudly all the guys’ jokes while squeezing her shoulders together so they can see her cleavage.   The future queen is too wise for that.  She understands that if she presents herself like a fool that any man can have then men will treat her like a fool that any man can have.

The future queen, wherever she is, whomever she is, speaks with wisdom and kindness.   And she isn’t nice according to class, or ethnicity, or economic status, or how closely the other people match her concept of physical beauty.  She is kind according to the law of God. 

Because God said so, she loves and speaks kindly to her neighbor---- her rich neighbor, her poor neighbor, her Christian neighbor, her you-believe-what neighbor, her same-race-as-me neighbor, her not-my-same-skin-tone neighbor, her looks-like-they-got-it-all-together neighbor, her everything’s-falling-apart neighbor, etc., etc.

She’s not nice because she’s weak.  She isn’t kind because she’s “fake.”  (“Fake” is such a hellishly stupid concept.  Like somehow it’s more genuine to be a gossiping jerk than to be freakin’ polite and professional.)  The woman who will be queen is not polite because she wants something from you.  She is kind because that’s how the Bible, the law of God, teaches her to be. (Ephesians 4: 29-32;  Luke 10: 29-37)

The same speaker who described the virtuous woman also advised the reigning king: 

Open your mouth for the speechless,

In the cause of all who are appointed to die.

Open your mouth, judge righteously,

And plead the cause of the poor and needy. ( Proverbs 31: 8, 9)

A Proverbs 31: 26 woman speaks kindly and wisely because that is what good kings do, and she is a match for a king. 

In the South, we have a word for a such a woman.  We call her a “gracious lady.”  It’s the way we describe the wives of governors and presidents, and the matriarchs of great families.   It’s what we expect of our queens.

Speak to people as a gracious lady.  It’s what God expects of His queens.

Walk in wisdom toward those who are outside, redeeming the time.   Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one. (Colossians 4: 5, 6)

---Anderson T. Graves II   is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry, and rural leadership development.

Rev. Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Hall Memorial CME Church in Montgomery, Alabama, executive director of the Substance Abuse Youth Networking Organization (SAYNO) and director of rural leadership development for the National Institute for Human Development (NIHD).

Email atgravestwo2@aol.com
Friend me at www.facebook.com/rev.a.t.graves

To hear sermons, read devotions, and learn more about the ministry at Hall Memorial CME Church, visit www.hallmemorialcme.blogspot.com .

You can read more on Pastor Graves's personal blog at www.andersontgraves.blogspot.com  .

If this message helps or touches you, please help support this ministry. Send a donation of any amount by check or money order.
Mail all contributions to :
Hall Memorial CME Church
541 Seibles Road
Montgomery, AL 36116

Proverbs 31: 26. "Gracious Lady"

Proverbs 31: 26     She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness.

Proverbs 31: 26.  The ideal woman, the kind who’d make a great queen, knows what to say and exactly how to say it.  She is not the airhead  laughing mindlessly and loudly all the guys’ jokes while squeezing her shoulders together so they can see her cleavage.   The future queen is too wise for that.  She understands that if she presents herself like a fool that any man can have then men will treat her like a fool that any man can have.

The future queen, wherever she is, whomever she is, speaks with wisdom and kindness.   And she isn’t nice according to class, or ethnicity, or economic status, or how closely the other people match her concept of physical beauty.  She is kind according to the law of God. 

Because God said so, she loves and speaks kindly to her neighbor---- her rich neighbor, her poor neighbor, her Christian neighbor, her you-believe-what neighbor, her same-race-as-me neighbor, her not-my-same-skin-tone neighbor, her looks-like-they-got-it-all-together neighbor, her everything’s-falling-apart neighbor, etc., etc.

She’s not nice because she’s weak.  She isn’t kind because she’s “fake.”  (“Fake” is such a hellishly stupid concept.  Like somehow it’s more genuine to be a gossiping jerk than to be freakin’ polite and professional.)  The woman who will be queen is not polite because she wants something from you.  She is kind because that’s how the Bible, the law of God, teaches her to be. (Ephesians 4: 29-32;  Luke 10: 29-37)

The same speaker who described the virtuous woman also advised the reigning king: 

Open your mouth for the speechless,

In the cause of all who are appointed to die.

Open your mouth, judge righteously,

And plead the cause of the poor and needy. ( Proverbs 31: 8, 9)

A Proverbs 31: 26 woman speaks kindly and wisely because that is what good kings do, and she is a match for a king. 

In the South, we have a word for a such a woman.  We call her a “gracious lady.”  It’s the way we describe the wives of governors and presidents, and the matriarchs of great families.   It’s what we expect of our queens.

Speak to people as a gracious lady.  It’s what God expects of His queens.

Walk in wisdom toward those who are outside, redeeming the time.   Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one. (Colossians 4: 5, 6)

---Anderson T. Graves II   is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry, and rural leadership development.

Rev. Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Hall Memorial CME Church in Montgomery, Alabama, executive director of the Substance Abuse Youth Networking Organization (SAYNO) and director of rural leadership development for the National Institute for Human Development (NIHD).

Email atgravestwo2@aol.com
Friend me at www.facebook.com/rev.a.t.graves

To hear sermons, read devotions, and learn more about the ministry at Hall Memorial CME Church, visit www.hallmemorialcme.blogspot.com .

You can read more on Pastor Graves's personal blog at www.andersontgraves.blogspot.com  .

If this message helps or touches you, please help support this ministry. Send a donation of any amount by check or money order.
Mail all contributions to :
Hall Memorial CME Church
541 Seibles Road
Montgomery, AL 36116