THE (REST OF THE) GOLDEN RULE FOR PARENTS

In Matthew 7, Jesus praised God’s parenting skills.  Our Heavenly Father, as Jesus explained, is the standard and model for all human parents.

If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him! (Matthew 7: 11)

And that is the context for one of the most quoted (and misquoted) verses in the Bible, the Golden Rule.

Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. (Matthew 7: 12)

Jesus repeated this rule, probably lots of times.  Luke recorded one of those reiterations in  chapter 6. 

And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise.(Luke 6: 31)

Or, as we put it on our decorative plates, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

Jesus, genius that He is, encapsulated the entirety of ethics and social morality in one sentence.   But, for us to fully apply the Golden Rule, we have to do what our Heavenly Father did.  We have to apply the Golden Rule forward AND in reverse.

The inverse of Matthew 7 would read: “Whatever you want done to other men, do that also to yourself.”

God proclaimed judgment for the sins of men, judgment by death and separation from His grace.  So, what did God do to Himself?

He gave Himself, the Word of His Trinity to take sin upon Himself and die.  And when He, His Son, was covered in sin on the cross, the Father looked away and the Son cried out “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?” that is, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?” (Matthew 27: 46)

God did to Himself/ His Son what He would do to others.

God applied His own rules to Himself.

For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.  (Matthew 7: 2)

And God is our model as parents------ right?

O.K.  Now think about how you reacted when you heard about Chris Brown beating up Rhianna. How indignant were you when you saw the video of a big pro football player punching his slender girlfriend in the face?  Recall your reaction when you read about a federal judge beating up his wife and getting away with what amounts to a promise to erase the charge from his record?

Don’t you want justice for the women?  Don’t you want JUDGMENT against the men who treated those ladies with violence instead of the respect they deserve?

Good.

But now, imagine (or remember) your son’s principal calling to tell you he hit a girl at school?

Do you want YOUR son punished?  Do you want YOUR SON  to lose his place on the football team?  Do you want your son to feel the full weight of JUDGMENT?

Or do you ask, “Well, what did the little b***** do to him?”

Do you want others to judge your son the same way you want them judged?

If God is your model as a parent, you should.

You don’t have to be a monster to turn your child into one.  All you have to do is defend them when they behave monstrously.

When Jesus was covered in sin on the cross, God didn’t make excuses for Him----- and Jesus was/ is personally perfect.  Your baby and mine?  They’re not perfect.    What excuse do we have for the excuses we make for them? 

Spare the rod and spoil the child.  Well what if the rod is in somebody else’s hands?

Yes, protect them from evil. Yes, defend them against every INjustice.  Demand equity.  Advocate for their rights, privileges, and advantage.

But.

Just remember the Golden Rule.   Remember how God applied the Golden Rule to His Son.  Let’s do the same for our children.   It won’t kill them.  It’ll make them better people.

If God is for us, who can be against us?  He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? (Romans 8: 31-32)

---Rev. Anderson T. Graves II   (email:  atgravestwo2@aol.com )

Anderson T. Graves II is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry, and rural leadership development.

Rev. Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Miles Chapel CME Church (5220 Myron Massey Boulevard) in Fairfield, Alabama;  executive director of the Substance Abuse Youth Networking Organization (SAYNO);  and director of rural leadership development for the National Institute for Human Development (NIHD).

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