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| Adam & Eve Mourning Abel painted by Louis-Ernest Barrias |
Thus says the Lord:
“A voice was heard in Ramah,
Lamentation and bitter weeping,
Rachel weeping for her
children,
Refusing to be comforted for
her children,
Because they are no more.”
Thus says the Lord:
“Refrain your voice from
weeping,
And your eyes from tears;
For your work shall be
rewarded, says the Lord,
And they shall come back
from the land of the enemy.
There is hope in your
future, says the Lord,
That your children shall come back to their own border. (Jeremiah 31: 15-17)
Dear
Grieving Mother,
Let
me tell you a true story. It happened a
long time ago, but it may sound familiar.
In
a close knit community, a young man was killed.
It came to pass, when they were in the field, that
Cain rose up against Abel his brother and killed him. (Genesis 4: 8)
A
brother from the community was stopped and questioned.
Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?” (verse 9)
He
denied responsibility, but the evidence against him was overwhelming.
Cain said, “I do not know. Am I my brother’s keeper?”
And the Lord replied, “What have you done? The voice
of your brother’s blood cries out to Me from the ground.” (verses 9b, 10)
The
brother was convicted of murdering one of his own. His future was ruined. All of his great potential for success taken
away.
So now you are
cursed from the earth, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother’s
blood from your hand. When you till the
ground, it shall no longer yield its strength to you. (v. 11, 12)
The
sentence for his crime was life. He would
never see his home or family again.
A fugitive and a vagabond you shall be on the earth.
(v. 12)
He
appealed.
And Cain said to the Lord, “My punishment is greater than I can bear! …it
will happen that anyone who
finds me will kill me.” (v. 13, 14)
And
the judge commuted his sentence, but the leniency of the new punishment didn’t diminish
the pain orbiting around his crime.
And the Lord set a mark on Cain, lest anyone finding
him should kill him. (v. 15)
The
murderer’s descendants perpetuated and
exasperated the cycle of violence and self-destruction against their young men.
Then Lamech said to his wives: “Adah and Zillah,
hear my voice. Wives of Lamech, listen to
my speech, for I have killed a man for wounding me, even a young man for
hurting me. If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, then Lamech seventy-sevenfold.”
(v. 23, 24)
This
is the life and legacy of Cain, the original murderer. To us Cain was just plain bad.
But
not to his mama.
He
was the first child. More importantly,
he was HER first child. Eve rejoiced when
Cain was born. She gave him a name that means
“possession” or “to acquire.” He was
hers. He was Mama’s precious baby. Mama’s little man.
Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and
bore Cain, and said, “I have acquired a man from the Lord.” (Genesis 4: 1)
Cain
was his mother’s pride and her joy.
Imagine
her love for him and the son who followed. Now, imagine her pain when she had to bury one
son and lose another to the justice system.
Cain’s
judge was God Himself. There was no
corruption in the ruling. Cain’s
punishment was both just and merciful. But
do you think that made Eve feel any better?
Do you think Adam grieved any less because the results were “just”?
Was Cain’s mother able to move on? Yes.
Was
she able to get over it?
Never.
Adam
and Eve eventually had another son. Eve
named this one Seth, which means
“compensation.” The new baby was
supposed to make up for her loss. Indeed,
God made Seth a special blessing to Father Adam and Mama Eve. He was a good kid and a great father. Their grandbabies through Seth “began to call
on the name of the Lord.” (verse 26)
But
Eve never got over the babies she’d lost.
Even in the sweet moments after her “compensation” came into the world,
the first mother remembered Abel. She
remembered Cain. (verse 25)
The
writer(s) of Genesis weren’t there when all of this happened. Adam and Eve probably didn’t leave journals
behind. Perhaps their stories were
passed down through oral history.
Perhaps the Holy Spirit revealed it all through visions of the
past. (If God can accurately reveal the
future through prophecy it’s can’t be MORE difficult for Him to accurately
reveal the past.)
Whatever
the mechanism, God wanted this tragic narrative preserved and passed to
us. Seth himself is long gone. Cain’s line was destroyed in the Flood. So
what is God’s point for going through the trouble of telling their story?
In
part, so grieving mothers and fathers today know that their stories are not
theirs alone. Your pain is personal, but
it isn’t original.
Whether
you lost your child to miscarriage, sickness, accident, violence, criminal
justice, or however --- you are not the first parent whom God has comforted
through such a time.
The
fallen-ness of this sinful world makes such tragedy possible. On the grandest scale it is inevitable. But God is still present, and active, and able
to bring good even after the worst possible bad has happened.
The
mother and father in this and many other tragic tales in Scripture were part of
the Messianic line. Thus the Bible
proves that God won’t let your great pain be the end of your place in His great
plan. He will give you “compensation.”
Such
blessing isn’t always in the body of another child. But your “compensation” is
available in your gifts, your example, your enhanced compassion and
sensitivity, your deepened surrender to God.
Remember
that the “gift” of another son to Adam and Eve was also the calling to serve as
parents. Don’t miss your “compensation” because
it’s packaged as your SERVICE.
Like
Eve, you will never forget. Like Eve, you
can forge ahead. Like the first mother,
you may never completely “move on,” but you can still move forward. God has a plan and you’re part of it.
Dear
weeping mother,
God
wants to bring forth joy and greatness from you. He wants to give you a future and a hope.
He
can. He’s done it before.
---Anderson T. Graves
II is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry,
and rural leadership development.
Rev.
Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Miles Chapel CME Church in Fairfield,
Alabama; executive director of the Substance Abuse Youth Networking
Organization (SAYNO); and director of
rural leadership development for the National Institute for Human Development (NIHD).
Email atgravestwo2@aol.com
#Awordtothewise
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P O
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